Aggressive Indecision: Remodel Part II

So lately, the voices in my head have been shouting at me:

TILE! TILE! TILE!

CHOICES! CHOICES! CHOICES!

Yes, the voices in my head sound like a car dealership commercial that someone forgot to put on mute.  (You mean you don’t have voices in your head?)

I’ve been so focused on choosing a flooring option for our kitchen remodel, that I’ve even had dreams about it.  Its that bad, people.  As my husband and I discussed our numerous options, we figured out the reason this decision is difficult:  the flooring choice is the final piece of our big design puzzle, and it has to fit perfectly.  Otherwise we’d end up with something like this:

Nothing screams ‘after thought!’ like a floor made of stickers.  Unless of course you lived in the Barbie dream house; then it would be awesome.

My problem is this overwhelming need to look at every choice available to me.  It helps me feel that I’ve made an informed decision that I won’t regret.  However, when you have thousands of choices, it isn’t exactly feasible to look at every single one.  Heck, even after just looking at fifty tile choices, I start to feel ‘glazed over’.  *ba dum CHING!*

(As a side note, puns are horrible, and I apologize for subjecting you to that)

We’ve decided on a dark floor, to contrast our white cabinets and balance the black counters.  My observation process went something like this:

Hmmm…The top one is too dark.  The bottom one is too…sparkly.  I don’t want people asking why I used a glitter mop…

This one is too…line-y.  I don’t think the carpet and the tile get along well.  Even if I did put them in separate rooms, they would probably still fight.

Oooh, now what do we have here?  Subtle gray color in a porcelain tile?  A nice concrete look and finish?  12×24 size?  AND it compliments the other finishes we have?  I think we have a winner!

*calls for pricing*

“What do you mean that’s the price WITH the professional discount!?”

*bottom lip quiver*

*new resolve and determination*

“I guess I’ll have to look around some more to find a similar tile – but with a lower price!” (Which I found! ha!)

I’m not certain I’ll be able to find exactly what I want (that tile!) at a lower price (I DID!), but I feel it is my OCD duty to try.  That’s right, my duty.  I’m not actively choosing to waste more time trying to stick it to the man by saving an extra dollar a square foot on a 170 square foot job…it’s my solemn responsibility to provide everyone else out there with the information they need to get the same tile cheaper.  It is up to me to find the best price for the good of humanity!  *cape waves in the wind*

After spending endless hours looking at floor options coupled with this thing called “life”, I’m left scratching my head on Friday afternoon asking, “Where did the time go, and why haven’t I picked some tile yet!?”.

In part, I blame the new responsibilities of homeownership for taking up my time.  We attended our first home owner’s association meeting last night, and from the amount of white hair in the room, you’d think it was a bingo hall. Unfortunately, the only gambling going on was whether a select few could complain about every line item on the agenda without people glaring at them.  They lost that bet.  I glared.  I’m that sort of neighbor.

One lady in particular complained about two girls who were remodeling their condo and were “doing work on the weekends!”.  She didn’t seem to understand that if you live there, then you sort of have to do the noisy work there.  And most people have these things called “jobs” during the week.  (Where do I sign up for that?)

We do have a rule in place that only allows contracted or hired help to work M-F between 9am and 5pm, but there is nothing to prevent a homeowner from getting out a saw and making a ruckus on the weekends.  This explanation was completely lost on her, however, as the low roar of complaints filled the room.  I’m pretty sure I heard someone shout, “BINGO!” somewhere in there.

Somehow, the sound of saws during the day doesn’t seem so bad after living above an audiophile who doesn’t understand that sound waves move through walls – Its a revelation, I know.  I’m secretly plotting our remodel as revenge for his regular 2am subwoofer demonstrations.  I can imagine our tile saw going now! Muwahaha!

I know, I’m a horrible person.

As a final aside, this new website development ‘thing’ is taking longer than I thought it would.  Long story short:

“I have money for web design! who wants it!?”

*crickets*…..*excuses*….

“FINE! I’ll keep my money, go home and cry, and figure out how to do it myself!”

*commence shopping spree with extra money*

“yay! now I can look like an adult with normal, plain shirts, instead of tshirts with pictures of talking french fries.”


(Okay, I might still wear that shirt, but who could resist?)

Until next time!

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